Listen...to each other

Catherine Montgomery

💫Meet Catherine Montgomery, founder and executive director of The Lighthouse, which partners with Episcopal and other affirming churches to provide safe spaces for LGBTQIA+ youth and their parents.🏳️‍🌈

What’s a small but meaningful way you show others they’re truly heard?

In my experience, it’s been important to provide intentional spaces for story-sharing, where people are invited to speak and others are expected to pay attention, making sure folks who are more introverted or who are still building trust can opt out. When what is shared becomes part of the fabric of the community (especially when it’s just lighthearted points in common that are revealed), a sense of being truly heard flows into a sense of belonging and community. That’s powerful.

What advice would you give to others who want to build stronger connections within their faith communities?

Show up. That’s pretty much it! I heard a hospital chaplain say recently, “You can pretend to care, but you can’t pretend to show up.” When it comes to strong connections, showing up week after week -- no matter if you are busy with life or just not in the mood that day – that’s the main thing. That’s especially true if you are showing up for people who aren’t sure who they can count on, or who aren’t typically valued in religious spaces.

What is one book that shaped your approach to ministry?

All the books by Gregory Boyle, starting with Tattoos on the Heart (amazon) (audiobook). He keeps things simple, always recognizing that people are worthy and valuable, and often in need of the deep healing that comes when you just listen and point out their belovedness. True ministry is kinship – drawing a circle so wide that there is no one outside.

What is one podcast you’d recommend?

Lately I’m enjoying “No Small Endeavor” with Lee C. Camp, which explores what it means to live a good life. The range of guests is wide, but all seem to bring me a sense of peace, optimism, and gratitude for meaningful work to do.

What’s the worst movie you saw last year?

I can’t think of any – probably because I don’t watch a movie unless it’s gotten a Rotten Tomatoes rating of at least 90%! (I highly recommend this method… it has only once steered me wrong. That was Uncut Gems, which I hated.)